Last weekend I decided to blow my hair out and try a particular style. After I blew my hair out (for those of you who may not know. A “blowout” is simply when you blow dry your hair with a brush or comb or some sort of attachment) I started playing with it in the mirror being silly. While doing this I realized, I like my big, fluffy, wild hair.
This made me reflect on my whole experience with my hair in the corporate world and just in general. So as most other black women I used to use the creamy crack (relaxer). As I got older I started experimenting with color. And I loved it. My favorite was the light browns. In order to save time here, in a nutshell I decided to go natural because I loved getting my hair colored. Color and relaxer don’t go together! I would start off with healthy decently long hair and by the end of the summer one half of my hair would be noticeably shorter and thinner than the other side. I would deep condition, moisturizer, everything. No matter what I did I had breakage. So natural I went.
Fast forward to 2.5 year later, my hair is full, fluffy, thick as hell and I love it. I remember wearing my curly hair to an old corporate job and everyone loving my hair except my own people. Older black women would look at me kind of with a side-eye. Or just straight out make comments like , “I don’t get the whole natural craze.” I had older family members that were just not a fan of my curly hair and were not afraid to let me know. At the least, give me a look like “It’s your head. Do what you want”. And I get it. Older folks from different generations have a different view on what hair should look like especially if you work in a professional environment. The comments or looks didn’t make me angry. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. But being new to the whole natural life the comments placed a little voice in the back of my head that discouraged me from wearing my naturally curly hair.
With the emergence of the natural hair movement, seeing all types of beautiful hair textures and styles everywhere. It has reconditioned my thinking. I’ve always secretly believed that I was some kind of artist, free spirit in a past life. Wearing my hair wild and free, with crazy glasses, painted overalls, and some kind of long smock thing. Previously because of the tiny voice, I was too hesitant and concerned with the looks or comments I would get so I didn’t really wear my any other way than straight. The older and more comfortable I get with me, the more that voice disappears. Now I am ready to just be me. Big hair, weird style, crazy glasses, overalls, bright bold lips, whatever I want. Well whatever I want within reason. I do still work in corporate america so I have to be put together during business hours. BUT as soon as those hours are over. Catch me out here living footloose and fancy free!
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